The events of last night played in my mind. I knew this was the last straw that broke the camel’s back. Dad would never forgive me.
“Ah! Awurade, madi nkwasiasɛm! Oh! (Ah! Lord, I have been foolish. Oh!)” I laughed hard.
A moment ago, I felt sorry but now it was like I didn’t care. The darkness was beginning to eat my brain like the zombie from the movie I loved so much, “Dark Zombie, the brain eater”. It covered me like a thick blanket providing warmth and comfort to my cold and lonely heart. I stared at the ceiling wishing that morning might never come. The darkness seemed to thicken all around. I loved the darkness. I was captivated by the darkness. I just wanted to be there, after all I felt loved. I could do anything I wanted without being exposed. I didn’t need my dad’s approval again after all.
I sighed, “Oblivion. That’s the life.” I heard footsteps. I shot up from bed and picked a heavy, slender object and propped it against the door. I couldn’t have completed this arduous task had it not been for the darkness. The dark air around me grew denser causing the object to practically float in space. I simply had to direct it to the door.
Knock. Knock. I remained silent satisfied at the thought that my dad couldn’t enter. I knew it was my dad but then how could he still come and wake me up as he routinely did morning after morning. Last night, I actually rejected him. The door creaked. My jaws dropped. The door opened with ease. How is this possible? I bet Einstein won’t be able to explain this. My dad headed straight for the curtains and opened it. I was blinded by the light that flooded the room. Darkness save me!
I finally opened my eyes after unsuccessfully fighting off the light rays from invading my privacy. My dad looked at me with a smile. Darkness couldn’t stand the light. Such a weak ally! I couldn’t even describe it as a fair weather friend for in fair weather it wasn’t around either. Logically, it was an enemy all along. The General’s voice echoed in my cranial cavity, “**Aboa bi bɛka wo a, na ɛfiri wo ntoma mu. (If an animal bites you, it must have been from your cloth.)” I realized immediately that I was naked; I felt ashamed and awkward. With my eyes fixed on my dad, I groped around for my underwear.
It was obvious to my dad as to what I was doing in the dark and what I intended to do now but he just stood there smiling with tears in his eyes and his love just weighed on my mind. Unfortunately, my mind couldn’t measure it’s weight. Also, the early morning breeze just…just made the atmosphere magical or should I say spiritual. Well, all I care now is my room is no longer stuffy and the sweat that glistened on my skin and caused discomfort began to evaporate. How could I have been so blind? Dad took the blanket and covered my nakedness. He accepted my apology and took my shame.
“Dad, how did you open the door?” He laughed real hard. He then flexed his muscles and then said, “I’m stronger than a pen.”
I looked and saw the pen lying behind the door. I felt like strangling darkness. Darkness is just the absence of light; absence of life. It was an excuse for emptiness; a vacuum which eventually sucked you into an abyss. I felt used but then my dad’s arms tightened around me. I placed my head on his chest and listened to his heart beat.
“Daddy, how can you forgive me again and again?”
“You don’t get it son, it is our relationship that is dear to my heart.”
Well, I may not deserve it. Nothing here may make sense to me. I may be confused but that didn’t matter anymore because he is my Dad. He is God! He is Jehovah! The I am that I am. He is the one who guides me, his son. He is the one who sheds light on any dark issue in my life. Any questions? I don’t what kind of question you’ll ask but I’m sure I’ll will end up saying…
“He is my Dad and that’s what Dad does!”